|
137
No worries: Submitting to Status King does not change your Facebook status.
|
Top 25 Status Updates of All Time - joke
adult language filter view tags | Tag: joke [X] Note: status updates containing adult language (a) are not eligible for crown.
View All Tags Top Tags close [x]
alcohol awesome best bored clever cool crazy death facebook food friends fun funny god good haha happy hilarious humor humour ironic irony joke king life lol love money music new obama people pun puns quote random sarcasm sarcastic sean sex silly smart status status king stupid true upside down witty women work
Supported Languages close [x]
These are languages for which we are currently accepting status update submissions. Click on a language to view status updates in that language. Click here to request a new language.
| 1 |  |
| 457 | |
|
Kristin
Dear Pringles, Now that I am no longer a child, I can no longer fit my hand inside your tube of deliciousness. Work on that.
Oct 6, 2009
-
6 Comments
· Make this my status
·
REPORT
· Share
| 2 | |
| 382 | |
|
Antonio
was playing "FARMVILLE" when immigration showed up and took all my workers ! ! !
Jul 30, 2009
-
6 Comments
· Make this my status
·
REPORT
· Share
Like it? Comment
| 3 | |
| 333 | |
|
Erik
: Build a man a fire and he is warm for a day. Set him on fire, and he is warm for the rest of his life.
Jun 29, 2009
-
4 Comments
· Make this my status
·
REPORT
· Share
Like it? Comment
| |
| * | |
|
Phillipe
party every day that begins with the letter T. Tuesday and Thursday? Nah, TODAY and TOMMOROW!
Dec 1, 2009
-
Comment
· Make this my status
·
REPORT
· Share
| 4 | |
| 182 | |
|
Joshua
's Password is MickeyGoofyPlutoDonaldAtlanta, Facebook told me it had to be at least 4 characters long and include at least one captial!
Nov 18, 2009
-
3 Comments
· Make this my status
·
REPORT
· Share
Like it? Comment
| 5 | |
| 155 | |
|
Kristin
I can't really remember, but I think my life must have been a lot more productive before I discovered Facebook...
Nov 2, 2009
-
Comment
· Make this my status
·
REPORT
· Share
Like it? Comment
| 6 | |
| 113 | |
|
Christi
thinks that if I stand high enough on my Tippy Tippy Toes...I might be able to see Friday!
Apr 7, 2009
-
Comment
· Make this my status
·
REPORT
· Share
Like it? Comment
| 7 | |
| 96 | |
|
Craig
life is like mario bro's, ya have to slay a lot of dragons before ya meet ya princess
May 19, 2009
-
1 Comments
· Make this my status
·
REPORT
· Share
Like it? Comment
| 8 | |
| 68 | |
|
Emily
Laughter is a medicine with no side effects.
Oct 21, 2009
-
1 Comments
· Make this my status
·
REPORT
· Share
Like it? Comment
| 9 | |
| 66 | |
|
Richard
what did the baby corn say to the mom corn? -- "where's pop corn??
Nov 24, 2009
-
Comment
· Make this my status
·
REPORT
· Share
Like it? Comment
| 10 | |
| 59 | |
|
Katie
knows kids in front of cars cause accidents & accidents in the back of cars cause kids!
Apr 12, 2009
-
1 Comments
· Make this my status
·
REPORT
· Share
Like it? Comment
Like it? Comment
| 12 | |
| 41 | |
|
Luis
Interrupts yours status just to let you know that I have one of the best staus of all time --KANYE--
Sep 16, 2009
-
Comment
· Make this my status
·
REPORT
· Share
Like it? Comment
| 13 | |
| 30 | |
|
Ahmad
To the person that said impossible is nothing; Have you tried to slam a revolving door?
Aug 7, 2009
-
1 Comments
· Make this my status
·
REPORT
· Share
Like it? Comment
| 14 | |
| 28 | |
|
Lukas
you r a good friend..u cry, i cry. u laugh, i laugh. u jump out the window...i look down..and laugh again!:-)
Jul 11, 2009
-
Comment
· Make this my status
·
REPORT
· Share
Like it? Comment
| 15 | |
| 28 | |
|
Mike
what do u call a group of rabbits jumpin backwards?? a receeding hairline
Oct 14, 2009
-
Comment
· Make this my status
·
REPORT
· Share
Like it? Comment
| 16 | |
| 26 | |
|
Luan
Girls are like phones. They love to be held, talked too but if you press the wrong button you'll be disconnected!
Jun 3, 2009
-
Comment
· Make this my status
·
REPORT
· Share
Like it? Comment
| 17 | |
| 20 | |
|
Carli
hopes life isnt a joke... because she doesn't get it.
Feb 25, 2009
-
Comment
· Make this my status
·
REPORT
· Share
Like it? Comment
| 18 | |
| 19 | |
|
Luan
If high heels were so wonderful, men would be wearing them.
Jun 7, 2009
-
Comment
· Make this my status
·
REPORT
· Share
Like it? Comment
| 19 | |
| 19 | |
|
Nathan
says I was taught to finish my food because kids in africa were starving. Now I finish my coffee because people in india are sleeping
Mar 26, 2009
-
Comment
· Make this my status
·
REPORT
· Share
Like it? Comment
| 20 | |
| 19 | |
|
Junk
is something you've kept for years and throw away three weeks before you need it...
May 31, 2009
-
Comment
· Make this my status
·
REPORT
· Share
Like it? Comment
| 21 | |
| 18 | |
|
James
is thinking I want Chinese food for dinner. But since I am Chinese, should I just call it food?
Sep 23, 2009
-
Comment
· Make this my status
·
REPORT
· Share
Like it? Comment
Like it? Comment
| 23 | |
| 16 | |
|
Joanna
Today i went to IKEA and hid in the wardrobes. And every time someone opened the doors i welcomed them to Narnia!!
Nov 30, 2009
-
Comment
· Make this my status
·
REPORT
· Share
Like it? Comment
| 24 | |
| 16 | |
|
Adam
saw 5 birds on a wire, threw a rock and hit 1, how many were left? None, the rest flew away when I threw the rock.
Mar 11, 2009
-
Comment
· Make this my status
·
REPORT
· Share
Like it? Comment
| 25 | |
| 14 | |
|
Kristin
says keep staring….I may do a trick.
Oct 8, 2009
-
1 Comments
· Make this my status
·
REPORT
· Share
Like it? Comment
How the game works [x]
Contest
Every Tuesday a new Status King is crowned. It's similar to the game King of the Hill but for your Facebook status. If you get crowned as Status King we will send you a FREE T-shirt with your winning status on it.
Rules
- 1 vote per status per 24 hrs.
- 3 submissions per day.
- 1 vote = 1 point
= 2 points
- "Make this my status" = 5 points
- Buy a T-Shirt = 25 points
What happens when a new contest starts?
When a new contest begins, the Status King is inducted into the King's Archive for the preservation and glorious display of their winning status. For everyone else, all of the ranks (positions on the page) are retained for the next contest, but the vote counts are reset to zero, and the battle begins for a new Status King! May the funny and clever status updates rise to the top!
Status King Game winners are treated like royalty! [x]
Each Tuesday night, the original Status King Game completes and the winners are recognized. Now they get goodies too from the Status King Store.
Prizes will be awarded as follows:
#1 The Status King can now choose between the original custom Status King shirt featuring the winning status OR 2 free shirts (shipping included) from the Status King Store. Also receives recognition in the King’s Archive.
#2 Second place receives 50% off a single purchase in the Status King Store. Also receives recognition in the King’s Archive.
#3 Third place receives 30% off a single purchase in the Status King Store. Also receives recognition in the King’s Archive.
#4-#10 receive 20% off a single purchase in the Status King Store.
#11-#25 receive 10% off a single purchase in the Status King Store.
Facebook does not permit us to communicate winnings through their platform. Thus, if you finish in the top 25 in a game (when the finishes each Tuesday night, please email your name and a link to your winning status to winner@statusking.net, and we will email you the Status King Store code necessary to claim your discount.
Like it? Comment