When I finish a book, I always ask myself: what did I gain from this book? For good knowledge, I’ll give it 3 stars. If it provoked thoughts, 4 stars. 5 stars are reserved for those that can touch a soul. There is also another category with attractive plots that can drive you read and read, until the end of the day you find yourself gained nothing but killed a lot of time, which is actually annoying because of the low return on time investment. I give 2 stars to these temporary entertain... (show more)

When I finish a book, I always ask myself: what did I gain from this book? For good knowledge, I’ll give it 3 stars. If it provoked thoughts, 4 stars. 5 stars are reserved for those that can touch a soul. There is also another category with attractive plots that can drive you read and read, until the end of the day you find yourself gained nothing but killed a lot of time, which is actually annoying because of the low return on time investment. I give 2 stars to these temporary entertainments versus 1 star to those not even attractive.

I don’t read fictions as much as before as I found a lot of them would fall under 2 stars. The reviews of this book made me think it might worth a try, but only found my time wasted . The characters are flat and they stick to their stiff roles: good monk, evil lord, ambitious bishop etc. We have long passed the age of believing the world can be simply divided into good vs. bad. “God”-like people can do “dog”-like things, and people also do “evil” things to “live”. Disappointingly, not many characters in this book showed the complex of humanity. Of course the ending is predictable with good winning the evil. This might be a good primary school reading material if not X-rated.

The Pillars of the earth – 2 stars. (show less)

The main idea of this book is that many of our old notions of how to successfully raise children are actually unsupported by science. The arguments sound reasonable with the sociology experiments listed by the authors, however, I’d like to see more than little blurbs of those studies to be more convinced. But at least this book inspires a rethink regarding what are the traits we’d like to see in our children and how we are going to build them there. a chapter by chapter review:

1. Abo... (show more)

The main idea of this book is that many of our old notions of how to successfully raise children are actually unsupported by science. The arguments sound reasonable with the sociology experiments listed by the authors, however, I’d like to see more than little blurbs of those studies to be more convinced. But at least this book inspires a rethink regarding what are the traits we’d like to see in our children and how we are going to build them there. a chapter by chapter review:

1. About praise: Praise their efforts, not intelligence. -- totally agree. we should praise things that they can make a change, instead of what they cannot control. They won’t be willing to take challenges in order to avoid failures which will destroy their image of being smart.

2. About sleeping: lack of sleep could result in academic struggles, moodiness and even obesity. – Now I thank those days my parents forced us to go to bed at 8pm

3. About race: By not talking about race wouldn’t help kids build up a healthy view on this matter, because they are more racially aware than we think. – I have no experience on this but I agree that avoidance wouldn’t help.

4. About lies: punishment only makes better liars. – I agree with this argument. Guess which story is more successful in preventing lies, the boy who cried wolf or George Washington and the cherry tree? More people think the boy eaten by the wolf has a more dramatic effect on kids, but it’s wrong according to the authors.

5. About gifted kids: Kids’ IQ can be shifting, so early intelligence tests do not predict later achievement. – I believe even adults’ IQ can be changing (within a certain range of course), as the more we use a certain area of our brain, the smarter we will get for certain issues. Plus everyone is smart in different ways. High IQ can never guarantee a success.

6. about siblings: having a sibling doesn’t help develop a better social skill. – I agree, but what shocks me the most from this chapter is something else: kids actually learn how to be mean from books / videos that are meant to promote positive social skills, as the first half of the stories often include vivid details of how children can fight.

7. About teen rebellion: adolescents see arguments with adults as a sign of respect, not disrespect, and a sign of being honest. – I’m not fully persuaded. It’s also described how hard to teach American kids not to be bored. I was surprised about this as we were always occupied with many things when we were young, never felt bored. But I am scared by the example about how a teenage girl, an honored student, sneaks out at midnight to do stuff with boyfriend without her parents knowing anything. How to prevent this kind of lack of communication might be a challenge.

8. About self control: it may be something that can be developed, through a pulling not a pushing method. – I agree.

9. About playing with others: teaching our kids to only be nice won’t make them popular among other kids, the so-called "popular kids" are often very aggressive too. – We want our kids to be nice, but in reality they also need the aggression to maintain control. I think to have a balanced form between kindness and aggression is a key.

10. About language skills: it discusses why some children learn to speak more fluently and easily before others do. – I agree that the value of some "baby learning" programs on the market is questionable, but I also wonder if the authors are a little exaggerating on the effectiveness of the methods they recommend.

Overall, it’s a worthwhile reading experience. (show less)