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Rasheed
I have mixed emotions about Rasheed. I think he knew Aziza wasn't his shortly after her birth and considering how enmeshed he was in the culture of that time, I have difficulty being angry with some of his reactions. As American women, we are appalled by his treatment of his wives (and having more than one wife for that matter) but-and correct me if I am wrong-his behaviors were pretty much par for the course at that time. By the way, that is what draws me so much to the character Babi in the Kite Runner-who challenged these ideals.
Summer Worsham 11 months ago
I think Rasheed's rage came purely from the core of his being, making it completely justified to him at the very least. He viewed his marriage to Lailia as "saving her" making him a martyr of sorts, then allowing her illegitimate daughter to stay with them pushed him to the edge.
I did hold my breath the entire time they were locked in the room with no food or water. His behavior is abhorrent but in his mind, do you find it justified?
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While its been awhile since I've finished this book, I remember feeling like I really wanted to hate Rasheed but found it difficult. Yes his response to a number of events was deplorable to my Western feminist sensibility, but how hard do I fight things that I believe to be attacks on my family and perspective? What about those things (and even individuals) that I believe to be attacks to my pride?
The fourth main character in this book really was the era's climate of dramatic cultural and political change. The characters were looking for a way to emesh their pasts with the way their country was shifting, and somehow find personal fulfillment during all of that. It could be very easy for me to vilify Rasheed for making choices that I might not have made in those situations. Then again, how would I have responded to the sense internal and external powerlessness they all endured?
I think thats why I enjoyed this book so much; I honestly couldn't say what I would have done under those circumstances.
Facebook narys 11 months agoJustified or not, he really got me angry. In fact, after reading the book one afternoon, I noticed I felt bitter to men and was acting rude and short-tempered to my boyfriend for no reason. Fortunately, I soon realized I was acting out the emotions the book brought out in me.
And, actually, I don't think he was justified. There were other men in the book that weren't like that.
Facebook narys 10 months agoYou're right, there were two men that I can recall that weren't like that. Laila's father and second husband were of a different sort of male. Laila's father was seen as marginal by their community, and her second husband had more insight into what it meant to be a second class citizen as a handicapped individual moving through a changing enviornment.
I think that the very different male characters in the book helped illustrate the changes that every character was trying to comes to terms with. They're development helped explore the messy, painful, unjust way that people grow and cultures evolve for better or worse.
What gave this book its power was the emotional responses that I'm sure we all felt during its reading. I appreciated it as well as the opportunity to learn a little more about myself with each chapter. I'm sure we've all got a little Rasheed in us...
Facebook narys 10 months agoI really don't think that Rasheed was forgivable, and absolutely the things he did were really really screwed up. On an emotional level, I was glad that he was killed in the end.
With that said, some of the things you described we see in our country right now. Children are abused, families are broken by "evil" parents or other entities that are just as much the product of their enviornment as Rasheed was. It is entirely possible that given a similar set of circumstances and messages throughout life, that even you or I could commit similar sins in the interest of one thing or another. How I meant it to be taken is that I can empathize with Rasheed's character: if I were brought up in a world that valued captial punishment, female modesty and patriarchy above love and freedom of thought, would I be able to do things differently?
Facebook narys 10 months agoWhat is getting lost here is that we are a different culture and who are we to question what other cultures do.
Summer Worsham 10 months agoEthnocentric anyone?
I'm not saying that what Rasheed did is right, in our eyes . . . in our female American white bred eyes. But what is morally right or wrong and who makes that determination? I'm not egocentric enough to, that's for sure. I think Rasheed really did think he was doing the right thing and therefore it was justified to him. Think about it: this man with all his pride and being born into a culture where woman were less of a person raised a FEMALE that was not his. Yes, in dire straights, he did tear him from his mother and put her in an orphanage but for the most part, he aloud this woman have Aziza in his home, in his eyes this is the epitomy of disrespect, another mans child. The abomination of everything he was against, not only was Aziza a female, but not even his. He spent years providing for them. That is how he looks at it anyway.
Yes, not all the men in the book were like Rasheed, but most of the men his age were just like him. I also disagree with the point that other's frowned upon a thirty something marrying a fifteen year old, that was normal for that time, just as having more than one wife was.
I am not prepared to look through just my eyes in these stories. Other cultures do things completely different from us and what is morally okay with one may not be with the other.
Well I agree with the fact that condemning people is easy. The fact that Hosseini made you partially understand Rasheed is in my opinion a considerable merit. It is of course impossible to know what I or you would have done given identical circumstances, even though most people tend to say 'I would never do that' (cf. Stanford Prison and other experiments).
Facebook narys 10 months agoAt one point, when Rasheed tells Mariam many women would have been glad to even have a husband etc. she even thinks 'the worst part of it, was that Rasheed was absolutely right'.
So to make a statement: whether or not you condem Rasheed is mostly determined by whether you're more of a moral relativist or absolutist, but either way the way he behaved was terrible, revolting, wrong I would even dare to say. The question wether this was his fault, or the war, or god's or... is of course intirely different.
For the most part I hated him. But, I did like him in certain parts like how he treated his son and allowed Aziza to live with him. I guess one could say that society had taught him that women are like cars, but I feel that he either liked having the power over people and that he was closed-minded to new customs. I would really like to know how he treated his first wife especially since he actually had a picture with her still kept in his drawer.
Jacci DeWolfe 10 months agoYes, he did know that Aziza wasn't his, but I stopped having pity for this plight as soon as it was revealed that he had paid that man to lie to Laila all those years before. Jalil, for his faults, was not (to our knowledge) an abusive or violent man. Neither were Laila's or Tariq's fathers (or Tariq, but then he was a different generation). Domestic violence exists in every part of the world. What upset me just as much as the physical abuse described was the fact that Rasheed's behaviour was condoned by the laws of that society.
Facebook narys 10 months agoWhile I absolutely despised Rasheed for his cruel behaviour and treatment of Mariam and Laila, I can actually understand why he would act in this way. In some ways I felt sorry for him as I did the females, because life must have been just as tough for him, but unlike Rasheed, the women did not act in a cruel or apparently cold-hearted way.
When Rasheed was strangling Laila and Mariam killed him, I found it the most emotional and disturbing part of the story - even more than Mariam's execution.
Janine Plunkett 9 months agoRegardless of culture and ethnicity, what Rasheed did could have been accomplished in a better manner. However, with that said, his mind could have been warped by the sudden deaths of his first wife and son. Instead of being angry at himself and taking the responsibility of his actions, he instead took it out on those closest to him.
Facebook narys 9 months agoI probably will never know what Hosseini wanted the reader to see, but what I see is a grown up man, most likely abused in his childhood, using defense mechanisms of those of an abused kid. Think about it, he has to be in control at all times. Yes he allowed Aziza to live with them, but that just meant one more person that could take the blame of something he did and one more person that he could have control over. I'm no psychologist, but I know that there are some abused children that are never able to get over the tragedy of their past and their defense mechanisms kick in when they are under scrutiny or when their pride has been hurt.
The other male leads were not like this: Mariam's father was a weak male, Laila's father was a kind open-hearted weak male, Tariq was an understanding person, most likely due to his handicap. In the end, though, there had to be a driving antagonist, and this was all put into Rasheed, a character that people could truly hate for the things he did to the women and children.
The most shocking memory about this book and what I learned in World history, is how backwards the country became when the jihad took over. Instead of going forward with technology and education, they took a huge step backwards to the time when women were lower than cattle and men were the most important deal. This pertains to the character Rasheed in the fact that he was just a man caught in the changes of times and his saving ramifications was that everyone else was doing it, so why not him?
The character of Rahseed is the antagonist, the one who is meant to be hated. Maybe because of his past, or the way the jihad made it right for women to be punished for every minute detail, these were the reasons why he acted the way he did. This does not make his actions right, nor does is make his actions wrong. Rasheed was meant for the reader to question the subjective question of "what is right and what is wrong?" In this story he represented the worst that men can offer.
Culture or not, violence is wrong, how can anyone even question that?
Ava Molly Gaida 8 months agoIt's not like the Afghan culture supports it, and it's not like it's written in the Koran that it's allowed, society simply chooses to look away "What a man does in his own home is his business" - that's the stance that's taken.
Also, I refuse to take mercy in my judgement of him just because Laila had a daughter from another man, what he could've done, is thrown her out, let her run away, that would've been the "right" thing to do. But to keep her there and beat her just isn't forgivable.
The tragedy of it is, that the women weren't allowed to make there own living, and therefore were dependent on him for food and shelter, they had to endure.
It is also shown that Rasheed doesn't only beat them because it's a matter of honour, but because he's deliberately cruel - like when he makes Mariam chew gravel.
I think Mariam should have killed him right at the start, and ran away.
I am in agreement with you on many parts of this. There are men like Rasheed in the United States, and there are things in the Western culture that encourage such behavior in more subtle ways. Although he abused his wife, doesn't mean we can attribute his treatment solely to culture. the way he wooed both wives and then turned is a realistic picture of what abusers did in any culture.
Rasheed was more than just keeping his wives in line, he was truly twisted, and seemed to enjoy inflicting pain on them. All abusers have a soft side, even a pitiable side. that made his character believable.
I think it is not ethnocentric to condemn his behavior. Instead, I think it is dangerous and especially prejudiced to attribute Rasheed's abuse to his culture. Like many others have noted, he was the only male character who beat his wife.
the only direct cultural statement that I read from the book was that of the Taliban's treatment of women as lesser than men with no autonomy. It seemed that the Taliban's view of women made it so that Rasheed could more easily treat his wives however he chose.
Cherie Watters Catron 8 months agoIn many ways I still haven't decided what I think of Rasheed. He was only human, his world was literally falling apart around him, the life he had was blown up and I did pity him although not as much as Laila and Mariam. I don't believe he was really a bad man, he demanded respect, the war in the town did not respect the innocent citizens so he looked for respect from Laila and Mariam who understandably did not give him it. Looking at it from Rasheed's point of view, he was 'saving' mariam and Laila, through his eyes they talked back, hit him, ran away, gave him a daughter that wasn't his. Faced with a similar situation ourselves we would probably behave in a similar way even when we could not believe it now.
Lily Mellon 8 months agoAs he lost his shop, jobs and generally his life the only power he felt he had was over Laila and Mariam. He did not have the right to try to kill Laila, to beat them and control them but I understand why he felt he could or
needed to.
Lily Mellon 8 months agoi was just wondering, why everyone else in the book grows old but there wasn't any hint of rasheed growing old or at least his becoming weak. until the very end, he was at his prime. to think that he was way older than laila. that was just odd.
Chris-Jerome Magpusao 7 months agoI despised him from the moment he made Meeriam chew on the pebbles. You'll never convince me that this kind of behavior is justified or acceptable.
Lyndon Perry 7 months agoI had forgotten about the part when Rasheed makes Mariam eat the pebbles, that was just pure cruelty.
I didn't really mean his behavior was acceptable or justified and if I was to meet someone in real life like him I would hate and stay away from them, but somehow, which I can't really put into words, I found it difficult to hate Rasheed. I respected him for some things he did, but yes he could just be cruel, when he made Mariam eat pebbles, or for locking Laila and Aziza in the room for so long, I was thinking about Mariam and Laila rather than Rasheed and forgot about him.
Do you think it was right that Mariam killed him? and Do you think it was right for Mariam to take the blame in order to let Laila get away?
I also saw it was weird, although Rasheed's age was mentioned he never really got older, but didn't give it that much thought. I'm glad someone else saw that to though, I decided I just must of missed a bit out by accident, or maybe Hosseini thought part of his personality was not to become old and rely on Mariam and Laila to help him more, as he enjoyed being more powerful than them.
Lily Mellon 7 months agoI don't understand how anyone could justify what he did in any way, his character isn't even developed enough to see another side to him, he's just bad, full stop. His son died because he was drunk and negligent, and he forced Mariam and Laila to live with him. He wasn't doing them a favour at all in taking them in, because he didn't let them go when he wanted to, he kept them there and used them, used their helplessness.
Ava Molly Gaida 7 months agoI meant when they wanted to, oops
Ava Molly Gaida 7 months ago